It's hard to just pretend like nothing ever happened on October the eighth. I tried to pretend like it was any old day, and because I did, I got most of the effects on October ninth... Anyone with eyes could tell I was not myself. Seriously. Or ears. I was trying not to cry everywhere we or, rather, I went. It was all I could do not to burst into tears.

October 8th 2001 ruined me forever.

That was the day I began liking Pez. I did for 5 and a half years. Lately it hasn't been a problem... I haven't liked him like that, but it's still hard to think about. Hard to think about my first love being a complete disaster in everyway. Hard to think that he never did like me back and he likes my best friend instead, and she likes him. It's all just really hard.

I can't really talk to people about it without crying, so I just don't, usually. It's easier to type, though.

Nobody even reads this anymore though, so I don't know why I even bother. I guess its because I can't update MOMJ at the moment and I'm filtering onto this now. *sighs* Who knows? Who cares?

No one.

.Zyk.